somewhere in pawnee, indiana tumblr user ben talltyrionlannister is really popular in the game of thrones fandom probably
you’re doing an extremely good job at ignoring me don’t worry i can definitely tell keep up the good work
I’m sorry for the cock, crackashit handwriting, my dear sethmeyers :<
(yes my photoshop skills are not quite copacetic)
So I typed it out because…..I have illegible chicken scratch handwriting.
Hello there darling!
ermagherd- you’re finally legal and shit!
so first off, many, many happy returns! let me forewarn you- cheesiness ahead!
I’m very honest when I admit that I’m glad that we talk more often than before. You aren’t someone that comes by everyday, so you damn well know that you are irreplaceable.
You are the Tesseract to my Sceptre- helping me constantly expand my mind. I don’t have many friends whom I can joke with so candidly and so easily- not many appreciate my lascivious (AKA MY FILTH).
So thanks for that.
Now that you’re grown up and shit, remember this: always surround yourself with people who value you and care about you- ain’t nobody got time for fake bitches and poseurs.
Also know that I am availing myself as one of your callgirls- if you ever need to like rant or bitch. I’m super versatile- I can be soppy and patronizing, but i can also scream for you to get yo shit together.
So a very happy & blessed birthday once again, and you take care!
♡♡♡ THE SCEPTRE TO MY TESSERACT ♡♡♡ i love you like thor loves midgardian coffee *smashes coffee mug* ANOTHER!!!!!!!!!
OMFG HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY “IT DOESN’T MATTER HOW GOOD YOU LOOK IF YOU’VE GOT A SHITTY PERSONALITY YOU CAN LOOK LIKE RYAN GOSLING OR SOFIA VERGARA FOR ALL I CARE BUT IF YOU’RE GONNA BE A SHITTY HUMAN BEING THEN IT FUCKING DOESN’T MATTER YOU’RE STILL A TERRIBLE PERSON” UGH “LOOKS ARE EVERYTHING” IF TINA FEY CAN LAND A FUCKING JOB AT SNL WEARING A PANT SUIT AND SPORTING A BUTCH HAIRCUT BECAUSE OF WHO SHE IS THEN WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO TELL ME THAT YOU’RE BETTER THAN ME BECAUSE LOADS OF PEOPLE FIND YOU ATTRACTIVE JUST FUCK OFF ALREADY IF THOSE “AWESOME FRIENDS” OF YOURS KNEW HALF OF THE THINGS I KNOW ABOUT YOU THEY WOULDN’T BE THERE ANYMORE
i’ve spent so long trying to see the bright side but there’s no fucking point anymore
my little cousin got bit by a house spider and she was crying so i went to get some stuff to soothe and numb it but before i could even walk out the door i heard her quietly whisper ‘i can’t handle the responsibility of being spiderman’
In honor of the US Open and #TBT, check out this Late Night clip of Jimmy and Higgins try out for the position of ball-boy!
NATHAN’s in Singapore as we speak for Singapore Swim Stars meet. I’m proud to be a Singaporean.
Check out @SingapSwimStars’s Tweet: https://twitter.com/SingapSwimStars/status/504923470971432960
I’M GONNA SEE THIS CUTIE PATOOTIE NEXT FRIDAY AAAAAHHHHHHHH
I will reblog this everyday